I was in love.

One thing I am always curious about is how people stay in love for decades. How people still stay in love after spending every waking moment together. I’m not a cynic, I’m just realistic. And I’d rather be overly realistic than to be self-delusional.

He doesn’t know why.

The fond nights when you’d rush back just to hear a brief moment of her sweet voice are now replaced with ear-shrieking ramblings on loudspeakers while you’re multi-tasking.

The way you used to watch her eat and wondered how can anyone be so adorable…? Now, you nit-pick on her bizarre eating habits and ridiculously slow eating pace.

She used to be your bragging topic, your pride and glory but now you sigh in consent as your buddies poke fun of her.

What love is this, when you’d rather be by yourself than to feel so frustrated around her.

She doesn’t know why.

You used to jump in glee at the vibration of your phone, but now, you’re reading too deep into his every word and punctuation, and ‘last seen’ (s).

You used to be truly interested in his daily happenings but now, you’re inspecting his social media for any possibility of evidence that might threaten your relationship.

You get easily affected by the slightest things he says or does, but you can’t tell all that, because you don’t want to sound petty.

What love is this, when you start comparing every guy around you with him.

Everyone knows it, it’s whether or not they choose to accept it as their reality.

The matter of the fact is, when you get too close to someone, you open up yourself to them, you no longer try to restrain the ugliest side of you. It’s not that they didn’t know it before, but they just didn’t know how to deal with it when it’s at such a great extent, or frequency, whichever.

What you need is space. Space to breathe, space to live, space to appreciate everyone else around you and come back to realise he/ she’s all you’ll ever need. Whether this space actually makes the heart grow fonder or further, fret not, because even if they cheated on you, it didn’t happen because you trusted them too much. It happened because they finally had the opportunity to materialise their tempting thoughts which had already existed long before.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s